What Disciplemaking Is Not — And Why That Matters

We’ve complicated disciplemaking.

Somewhere along the way, we turned it into a checklist, a curriculum, or a job description. We started believing it was only for people with seminary degrees or spotless track records. And for many of us, we’ve felt the weight of needing to have all the answers before we can invite anyone to walk with us.

But here’s the truth: Jesus never asked us to be experts—He asked us to follow Him.

And then, as we follow, He asks us to help others do the same.

If you’ve felt unqualified or unsure where to start, maybe it’s time to stop asking, “What am I missing?” and instead ask, “What assumptions do I need to let go of?”

Let’s start with this:
 Sometimes the best way to understand what disciplemaking is—is to name what it isn’t.

1. Disciplemaking is NOT a class.

You can’t graduate from it. You don’t master it after ten weeks.

While classes can give us language, tools, and structure, disciplemaking is meant to be personal, and that can make it messy. It’s not something you attend—it’s something you live.

When Jesus called the disciples, He didn’t give them a workbook. He gave them His presence.

“Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people.”
 —Matthew 4:19

That invitation was to be with Him, not just learn about Him.

2. Disciplemaking is NOT about having all the answers.

Let’s go ahead and breathe a collective sigh of relief: you don’t have to be perfect to make disciples. You don’t have to know Greek, or have every answer ready, or live a sin-free life. You just need to be one step ahead of another and be willing to walk with them.

Peter was impulsive. James and John were hot-headed. Thomas doubted. And yet Jesus trusted them to carry His mission forward.

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
 —2 Corinthians 12:9

Disciplemaking doesn’t require your perfection—just your presence and your obedience.

3. Disciplemaking is NOT behavior management.

If we think our job is to modify someone’s behavior, we’ve missed the point entirely.

Real disciplemaking isn’t about controlling people or getting them to act the way we want. It’s about helping them become more like Jesus.

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
 —Romans 12:2

The Holy Spirit does the transforming. We simply create space, ask good questions, walk in honesty, and point people back to Jesus again and again.

4. Disciplemaking is NOT just for the spiritually elite.

Jesus didn’t choose the most impressive candidates to be His disciples. He didn’t go after the priests or synagogue leaders. He called fishermen, tax collectors, and misfits.

That should comfort us.

It means if you feel underqualified, overlooked, or unsure, you’re in good company. God’s Kingdom has always moved forward through ordinary, faithful people.

“Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards… But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise.”
 —1 Corinthians 1:26–27

5. Disciplemaking is NOT a program.

Programs can support the process—but they aren’t the process. We make disciples by doing life with people, not just scheduling them into our calendar.

Discipleship isn’t scalable in the way we often want it to be. It’s slow, relational, and deeply human.

Programs don’t produce transformation. People do—when they follow Jesus together.

6. Disciplemaking is NOT instant.

It takes time. A lot of it.

We live in a world that rewards speed and efficiency—but growth doesn’t work that way. Jesus spent three years with His disciples, and even at the end, they were still getting it wrong.

“Be patient with everyone.”
 —1 Thessalonians 5:14

Disciplemaking is long obedience in the same direction. It’s not about immediate gratification, but it is transformative.

7. Discipleship is NOT limited to Sundays.

It’s easy to think disciplemaking can just happen in Sunday School or in the pews. But the reality is it most often happens when we walk with people in their everyday: parenting struggles, hard conversations, shared meals, hospital visits, text messages on a discouraging Tuesday.

The Great Commission didn’t say, “Make church attenders.” It says:

“Go and make disciples of all nations… teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always.”
 —Matthew 28:19–20

“Go” means you have to leave the walls of your home and of your church.

8. Discipleship is NOT about making people like you.

If we’re not careful, we’ll try to shape people into our preferences or personalities. But the goal isn’t to make disciples of us. It’s to make disciples of Jesus.

“Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.”
 —1 Corinthians 11:1

If we’re growing in Christlikeness and inviting others into that journey, that’s enough. The aim is Jesus, not a carbon copy of our lives.

So, What Is Discipleship?

At its core, disciplemaking is following Jesus together.

It’s intentional. Relational.
It’s not about information—it’s about imitation.
It’s not about tasks—it’s about transformation.

Disciplemaking happens when we walk alongside someone in love, pointing them to Jesus—not as experts, but as fellow travelers.

It looks like slowing down. Showing up. Being honest. Listening well. Praying often. Celebrating spiritual growth. Sitting with struggle. Trusting the Spirit to do the deeper work.

You’re More Ready Than You Think

If you’re waiting to feel “ready,” you may never begin. And that’s the enemy’s favorite strategy—to convince us we’re not equipped enough, holy enough, or experienced enough to make disciples.

But Jesus’ invitation still stands: Follow Me. And help others do the same.

You don’t have to lead a crowd. Just start with one.

Say yes to walking closely with Jesus.
Say yes to inviting someone into that journey.
Say yes to the slow, faithful work of disciplemaking.

You don’t need a workbook. You don’t need a perfect plan.

You just need to begin.